How long has it been since you've started doing what you're doing? I'm not sure, frankly. It could be about 7 years since I've started taking black and whites. Pictures I mean, I'm not some equal opportunity slaver, lucky for you! Also lucky for you, I've stumbled upon my Photobucket which still holds my photo 1 pictures which I uploaded in 2005. These are fun to look at for me, and should be fun for anyone who's taken an intro photo class. Why?
All. Photo. 1. Pictures. Suck.
Even mine, and I'm like great. So let's explore my boring origins, or borigin, not to be confused with a blorange, which is a very negative orange.
Starting at the top of the page above that stack of retarded sentences, this is a scene from a sewer stream less than a block away from my old home. There are many rules when it comes to photo 1, the first rule that encompasses a few others is this: never try hard. This means not venturing far from your house or dorm. You wouldn't want to piss off your apathetic classmates by presenting anything interesting. This picture gets bonus points because of the overt hair/pube making itself known.
Another rule for photo 1 is to present an image that could be considered "artsy" but only by people who could be considered assholes. This is a spider web that is seen in the morning sun with drops of dew refracting the sunlight. A scene like this could represent new life, with elements such as leaves, water and sun while dualistically representing harbingers of death like a spider. It was also located next to my porch, which was the real reason why I took the picture.
Another tip for any photo 1ers is to make a picture so boring that the professor is forced not to focus on it too long and quickly lets you sink back into anonymity. A picture such as this one of two benches serves as a perfect example, moving on...
Another photo 1 rule: Always have a few pictures of water. People love water, it's very important to us. Also some water can be deep, and puns are funny, so take pictures of water if you want to say a picture is deep and get a huge laugh. Here's another:
See, in the first one that was nature water, even though it's in a concrete stream. But this, this is industrial water. Can you see how the latter is a bit more evil than the former. That's because humans do evil things because we hate nature. It's important as a photo 1 student to pick up on things that are bad and sad and take pictures of them so that you feel important. Just be sure not to record anything interesting, you don't want to break rule one.
See, like this.
And this.
Here's one last tip for this entry. Never limit your pretentiousness! If you have a picture that you can spin an asshole artsy description out of, don't stop. Kick it up a notch, as my favorite sitcom star once said. That's why I took this beautiful picture of forced perspective and made my first solarized image!
Now it is even artsier, and guess what... I got an A+. More to come!